Here is info on lots of different topics. You can read it in order or scroll through and pick what you need. You can read it in any order you like.
Questioning
Questioning your gender or wonder if you are trans is a part of transition for many people. Some people know when they are young and others don’t – all paths are ok and neither one makes you more or less trans. It’s also possible to doubt whether you are trans and still be trans. It makes sense that we might doubt ourselves since we live in a world that often times makes it seem like transgender people don’t exist.
Reading Material
There is a lot of great stuff online, but there are also things that can be hard to read. Before you click on that article ask yourself, how will this likely make me feel? If you are specifically looking for information on that topic that is one thing, but if you are going online to search for support and you come across something that might be tough to read then you need to make a choice: do I read this or not. Or perhaps you read it with someone else present, or read it and then share your thoughts with someone you trust.
Here are some places on Facebook where you can expect to feel good:
Wabanaki Two-Spirit Alliance, Bipocalypse Halifax, Trans Family Nova Scotia, Ally Centre of Cape Breton, Youth Project has a facebook group just for youth.
Here is one of my favourite books which is available from the public library system: Beyond Magenta: Transgender Teens Speak Out by Susan Kuklin
The Youth Project and South House have libraries about LGBTQ topics and anyone can borrow books there by going in person. And here are lots more in a Book List. I seem to have misplaced the source for this, I think it is either Venus Envy or the Youth Project.
Finding Support
Having someone who understands and supports you at school can make things a lot easier. Personally I have gotten support from teachers who I didn’t work much with, and also from teachers who know me well. Here is a list of people in school who you could try talking to if you are looking for someone to listen. They all have the duty to keep what you say private except in the case of a risk of harm or if required by law.
Guidance Counselor (all Junior High and High schools have one, and most Elementary schools) – just drop by the Guidance office and see if they are in. Depending on how many students attend your school the Guidance counselor may be there every day, or only one or a couple days per week. The Guidance counselor will take your lead on what you want to talk about. Let them know what is on your mind.
Schools Plus mental health clinician (some schools) – These are social workers. They usually work in a few different schools during the week. They usually post a schedule on the door with what days they are in. You can drop by and ask to talk to them.
Youth Health Centre nurse (some schools) – the nurse is a great resource for things like sexual health, self-harm, anxiety, free condoms/lube, pregnancy tests, and lots more. The nurse is probably at your school a couple days per week, so if you don’t see them there the first time be sure to go back.
It is important that you feel comfortable with whoever you are talking to. You can go once to the couselor and meet them and see how it feels. You are not under obligation to go back if you don’t feel ok talking to them. If you need help right now or are at risk of harm to yourself or others please reach out to someone you trust or use one of the free resources below.
Mental Health Mobile Crisis Team (902) 429-8167 or 1-888-429-8167 (toll free).
Transgender Lifeline – Canada: (877) 330-6366 US: (877) 565-8860 https://www.translifeline.org/
Kids Help Phone 1-800-668-6868
Dealing with bullying
No one should ever be bullied. If you are being teased or bullied for how you show your gender identity the other person is in the wrong, not you! Schools and principals have to take bullying seriously. My first advice is tell someone you trust what is happening, whether it is a friend, someone at home, or a teacher or another adult at school. Bullying or teasing really take a toll and you deserve to have support as you work through it. Second, if the bullying or teasing is happening at school, remember that the staff at school can’t help you if they do not know what is happening. As scary as it can be, it is important that an adult at school knows what is happening.
Coming Out
Just because transgender people are getting more visible doesn’t mean it is an easy decision to come out. It will happen when you are ready. Maybe some of these resources will be helpful as you think about coming out:
The Body You Live In
Some bodies have extra challenges to get through on top of being transgender. Many of these areas are explored in this book, available from the public library system: Trans bodies, trans selves : a resource for the transgender community edited by Laura Erickson-Schroth ; introduction by Jennifer Finney Boylan
Read about sexual health and lots of other great topics like body positivity and relationships HERE
Tips on binding from .5 cc, a company started by Aiden Dowling who became the first trans person on the cover of Men’s Health magazine.
Did you know, the Youth Project has a free binder and gaff program? You can apply online. All you need is to be 25 years old or younger and live in Nova Scotia.
Just like cis people, some trans people want to have a family and some do not. Having a family of your own is possible to do if you are transgender. There are lots of different ways a family can be. Hear a reading of The Family Book by Todd Parr HEREAnother book to check out is What Makes a Baby by Cory Silverberg. This is a book about babies that works for every kind of family. Hear Cory talk about the book HERE. This book is available at Venus Envy in Halifax, NS along with many other cool books for transgender children and youth.
If having children is something you think you might like to do one day, there are lots of interesting things to read from the LGBTQ Parenting Network. You can find information about different ways to start a family by searching within the LGBTQ parenting network. Here are some more stories about transgender people who have gone on to have children. Transgender Parents documentary —– Junior and Tina —– Breastfeeding as a trans dad: A baby doesn’t know what your pronouns are.
Waiting. There can be a lot of waiting involved if you want to physically transition…waiting for a counselor…waiting for an endo (a doctor who knows a lot about hormones)…waiting for changes to happen. If you are taking hormones, it takes time for things to happen. Waiting can be really frustrating and it is ok to feel this way! When things feel slow it can help to look back and think about how far you have come. Maybe a while ago you were using different pronouns or a different name than you are now. Maybe a few months or years ago you weren’t even looking for information about gender identity and now here you are exploring a website about it. Here is a comic called transition is not a race.
Bathrooms, changerooms, sports and more
You have the right to use whichever washroom you are most comfortable in. At places in the community this is also true. That being said, using the washroom, changeroom etc. can be scary if you are trans. A great resource to know about is Refuge Restrooms. It is a handy app that shows the location of gender neutral bathrooms all over the world! If you find another gender neutral restroom you can add it to the database anonymously.
Community happenings
There is tons going on! If you come across something that is happening click on the Resource tab and go to ‘Submit a Resource’ to let us know about it.
The Magic Project – increasing visibility for black and queer artists on the East Coast
Assigned Male – a webcomic by Sophie Labelle
FTM Magazine: The magazine for trans men
Thanks for reading, and remember…YOU BELONG.
Education for Gender Inclusion 